Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. (Colossians 3:18, NIV)
When I first got married, my wife Helen caddied for me on various professional golf tours. She proved to be a great encouragement to me as she carried my bag on the PGA Tour, Web.Com Tour, Hooters Tour, and various other tours. If you were to meet her, the last thing you would ever think is that she was formerly a tour caddie. Raised in Charleston, South Carolina, Helen has a sweet Southern accent and had never watched or played golf until we met in college.
When I am speaking with young men in college or those playing professionally today, I always brag on my wife and tell them, “Any girlfriend or wife who is willing to caddie for you, that is a good woman!”
But being a very driven, intense competitor, often I did not treat my wife and caddie according to Scripture. I remember one instance when I was hitting warmup balls about 20 minutes before my tee time. With about 10 minutes before I was scheduled to tee off, she showed up on the range. I had left her several clubs to clean. Upset that she was late, I yanked my 3-wood out of the bag and rudely told her, “Clean the clubs, and I’ll meet you on the first tee.” A few minutes later, she walked to first tee, threw the bag on the ground, and said something like, “Clean your own clubs!”
Paul wrote to the Colossian husbands that they should love their wives and refrain from harshness. This is a very convicting verse. Looking back now, I definitely would have benefitted from applying this verse in my marriage, especially when Helen was caddying for me. I thank God for his grace and forgiveness of my sins (and Helen’s too!), as I definitely was not close to the husband he desires in years past.
God’s amazing Word applies today as much as it did 2,000 years ago. Paul encouraged husbands to not be harsh, because it was a problem then. The same holds true today.
Over the last few years, I have lived in a state of repentance to the Lord over how I treat Helen. God has definitely worked to change me and improve the condition of my marriage as I strive to treat Helen with honor, dignity, respect, gentleness, and love. It holds true that marriage is not meant just to make you happy, but rather to make you holy. I thank the Lord for the wonderful wife he gave me and hope to glorify God with how I interact with my bride.
If you are married, your instructions here are clear. Love your wife well—don’t be harsh. And if you are a married woman, pray this God-glorifying gentleness into your man. Affirm it in him with kind words of your own. Cultivate kindness in one another be being kind to one another.
And if you are not married, God’s Word guides you too. Become the kind of man—that is, a kind man—that God desires. And ladies, look for that kind man as you seek a husband. No godly character trait is birthed too early, including the trait of looking for the excellent work God is doing in those he will use to support and encourage us most intimately!
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Korky Kemp
April 2, 2013
Copyright 2013 Links Players International
The Links Daily Devotional appears Monday-Friday at www.linksplayers.com.